So we've gathered a good amount of info on dealing with drama and we've decided it's time to start the post:) Feel free to discuss, argue and share your thoughts.
Drama is usually any situation that requires a lot of personal will (and help form God!) to deal with. It involves tough decisions, putting relationships with others on the line.
Do you agree with that statement?
Is drama bad?
What can we learn from drama?
How should we deal with it?
22 comments:
I really do agree with that statement. It has good meaning and it helps people to be assured that they can rely on God!
Drama can be bad if it is like peer-pressure, and you are getting into the wrong things.
We can learn to lean on God, because we trust him to help us get through it!
We should deal with drama by praying hard that God will be with us, and give us strength!
Well said Destiny.
Drama brings endurance and can potentially test us. We often pray for patience, but maybe God gives opportunity to be patient. Brings about a trail or temptation to see what we're made of and to refine us. Make us stronger, and when more drama hits, we have the God given ability to withstand it.
A few scripture verses come to mind
Zecheriah 13:9 I will refine them like silver and test them like gold. They will call on my name and I will answer them; I will say, 'They are my people,' and they will say, 'The LORD is our God.'
1 Corinthians 10:13 No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.
Keep strong, keep faithful and seek God in the midst of drama.
JTI
Thanks JTI! Yours was well said as well! :)
What everyone has said is great! But I would like to bring up the point that it is easier to say something, than to do it. What we've all said is all good in theory but how do you actually respond when in Drama? How should you act?
Also I find it easy to say that drama is immature and foolish, but it really cuts deep when you or one of your close friends are invovled:)
Drama is, for the most part, immature and foolish. It really is. But Sunny Smith is totally right when she says it can cut deep. We are only human. We all will end up a part of it at some point. We will all have friends who will face it. Its maturity level is not the issue, because you can still deal with it in a mature fashion.
How should you act? I believe your first instinct should be to go to God directly in prayer about the situation. Pray for guidance in what exactly your role in the situation should be, especially if you are not directly involved in the drama. Pray to give you the courage to reconcile if you have to. Pray that there will be mutual understanding in all parties involved.
Bearing that in mind, I always hold the attitude that information is key in these situations. Drama usually involves some kind of misunderstanding. Gaining an understanding of every-one's points of view is critical to seeing a possible resolution. Ultimately, the choice to solve these issues is between them and God, but I always hold the belief that God expects us to take ownership of the situations we find ourselves in (or get ourselves into) at the same time.
Sometimes this takes a bit of time, and a lot of thought to try and sort every-thing out mentally. As much as drama seems urgent, taking things thoroughly I believe is always the best option when dealing with drama.
This is a huge topic! Maybe people have some specific examples of what they have done? Just to exemplify their thoughts. (No names, please!)
Yes, I have an experince that I would like to share that deals with misunderstanings and a bunch of other stuff.
So my friend, let's call them Arm, had issues with holding grudges, and being unforgiving. Don't get me wrong Arm had a heart for God and they knew there Bible, but as we all do, Arm had it's weak spots. Anyways a problem between Arm and another friend of mine, Leg, had been going on for quite some time. Arm didn't like numerous things about Leg. Leg also had problems. Anyways, I could see that the issue had gone too far. I prayed about it for some time and felt God leading me to do something about it. The issue was stunting Arm's spiritual growth a lot. So one night I chatted with Arm about forgiveness and what it truly means to love someone. I thought that God had put the words in my mouth and felt fairly good about it. Than another of Arm's companions came and talked to me. They explained Arm's situation to me and assured me that they weren't mad, but accused me of taking Leg's side. I responed in the best Biblical way I could. I still felt awful though after I had chatted with both people. The dread and just plain awfulness overwhelmed me. I thought I was going to be sick. I can't even tell you why. I guess I was just hurting so much for Arm and was sure the friendship between us would be severed.
Quickly I posted a prayer request on the rebelution. I only could hope I hadn't wrecked the friendship. Thankfully I was eased b/c Arm didn't seem upset with me when I saw them next.
But than something truly miraclous happened. Arm came up to me and told me she had forgiven Leg for everything and had asked Leg for a fresh start. I was estatic! God had truly worked in this 'drama'.
Anyways, that's my story. I could tell that prayer had helped so much! So I urge you to pray hard and ask others to pray for you. It will ask for all of your humility.
Sorry guys, but I have one more thought:)
Jaye brought something most interesting to my attention, in regards to friends. I'm always scared to lose friends because I really share my convictions. Not b/c I fear having no friends, but how can I witness to them if they're not my friend and they hate me? Well Jaye said that you should never have to fear friends leaving and not being able to witness to them. If you stand up for your convictions, and they leave than maybe you're work with them is done and there is another person God has ready for them.
Sorry if that's jumbled but I thought it was an interesting point that Jaye made.
Sunny! I just read that! That is amazing! :)
I am also like that, you know, afraid to lose friends. But that is really true what Jaye had to say! :) Thxx!
I actually have another question for you all.
If one of your friends is invovled in some sort of drama, should you too get invovled?
For an answer to your new question Sunny, I would say that you could get involved if your friend asked you to help them, or if you think you CAN help. But I don't think you should get too involved because you don't want to get sooo involved that you can't get out of the situation.
Umm that was kind of hard to understand:P How about I rephrase my question into a senario:
Your friend, Wilma has just had a fight with your other friend, Sara and they have decided that they don't want to be friends anymore.
What should you do?
Is it right to get invovled?
OK, sorry. :P
For that scenario, I think that it is right to get involved, because it would be hard to hang out with both friends because THEY are not friends.
I think that you should talk to each of them seperatly, reminding them of all the great past times they had together, and how great of friends they were. You should also tell them how they shouldn't just throw it all away because of one fight. Then, they should both talk it over, and try to resolve it, and try to be friends again.
Does that make sense now?!
It's not always necessary for two people to continuing being friends. Sometimes with all their differences/disputes they're better off discontinuing the relationship.
All your friends will not always be friendly with each other, and that's just life. It's necessary to learn how to cope. Just hang out with them separately.
Hmm interesting thought....
But we are called to love each other right? So do you think it's okay to not be friends with some one, but love them? Do you think it's possible?
very interesting thought Sunny... to have both resentment and love for someone seems hard. Cuz Jesus said if we hate someone, we've murdered them basically. Sometimes people who arent our friends are usually people who get on our nerves, or who don't connect with. It is possible to love them but not like them. It's just really hard. Keep faithful to God, who will give the necessary wisdom.
its not always possible to continue being friends with someone, even if they're a Christian. it's not even necessary.
obviously you can't be friends with everybody you meet, but God still calls us to love.
its naive to think that every dispute or rift can be fixed in such a way that the two people can still be friends. sometimes they'll each have their own issues and colliding views that prevent a relationship from continuing.
Events in our lives each serve a purpose.
Events usually are not ongoing; they have a beginning and an end in some way.
This also applies to relationships we have with people. Sometimes, the purpose of knowing them is fulfilled and we need to move on. When this happens is usually out of our control, but is usually very apparent.
That being said, that does not mean to 'give up' on friends so easily. But if it becomes too much of a stressful issue just to see their face every morning, forget it.
Our walk is not easy, but it should never, never, ever compromise your own sanity. Walking with God is walking a rocky path, but with an all-helping guide. If you cannot handle it despite and only despite your best reliance on God... time to reconsider the situation involving your friend(s).
Hey guys, it is time I throw in my favorite catch phrase: COMMON SENSE. We pray to God to give you wisdom, so do not be afraid to use it! Use your head - God gave you it for that specific purpose.
Also be wary of time. Never expect instant results. Especially in terms of friendships and relationships, sometimes time - months or years - are required for wounds to heal.
yeah, but i think as teenagers who are so often swayed by the influences of the media, socities values, hormones, etc. common sense can get lost in the mix. eh craig?
That is defeatism. And that is no excuse.
Our bodies are temples and temples to God. We have control over them. So exercise control as it is demanded by God.
You will not succeed all the time; that is not the point. Try anyway because that is what God wants us to do.
Do not want to sound negative - but that is the truth. I say this because I care for you all.
i didn't say it was an excuse i meant that it was an explanation, and that its rather pretentious to believe that simple "common sense" will accurately dictate every decision we make :P
btw you owwe me an email
Hey guys (and girls!)
I first would like to say that I appercaite all your responses:) and I've learned quite a bit.
@The Scotsman: This is irrelevent, but I refered Cathy to you, when we were talking about SAC and leadership. I told her to tell you I sent her to ask about your opinion of leadership that you so passionatly shared with us on sunday night. I think it would be good for her to hear, but whiether she talks to you or not....
ANYWAYS to Everyone else who has no idea who or what I was talking about up there:P:
I've learned a great deal from my encouters with "drama" and to sum it all up I would probably have to say that the best way to deal with it is to turn to the bible and see what God is telling us to do.
For example, some people have posted about always loving each other.
Mattew 5:42-44
43"You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor[a] and hate your enemy.' 44But I tell you: Love your enemies[b] and pray for those who persecute you,
Here's a thought, I've noticed that we say we love someone as a brother or sister, yet our actions speak differently.
1 Corinthians 13:3-7
4Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
So if you read your Bible and if you don't know where to look than ask someone! Take what you've read and what God is telling us to do and apply it to you situation. Do what the Bible says to the best of your abilitys and leave the rest up to God. I've learned that one can only do so much. You are in charge of how you act and respond, but not how the other party(s) invovled does/do. That's between God and them.
I know it's extremely hard, but sometimes a simple sorry and asking for forgiveness is what's stopping the drama from ending.
Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose.
Any objections or disagreements to what I said?
OK. So, I read your comment Sunny...well most of it. The part that really stuck out to me was the part about how we say we love someone like a brother or sister.
Most of y'all know that I have someone who thinks of me as a sister, and yes, I think of her as a sister too. (I am not mentioning names, because I don't have her permission.)
Well, I have to say that Bible passage is very true. I hate to admit it, but I do get jealous of my "sister" and I envy her. I feel better knowing that some of you don't know who I really am, so you may not know who I am talking about.
But anyway, I do envy her, and I AM slow to get angry with her. I mean, she probably doesn't even know when I get angry with her. It doesn't happen often, and I think it is more because of jealousy than real anger.
I read this book once that talked about this girl and she was really focused on the Fruits of the Spirit. When she would notice that she would be feeling jealous or angry or un-self-controlled, then she would ask God to "chop out that vine". It may sound cheesy. I actually have tried that, asking God to take away that feeling. It really does work.
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